Grace and mercy

grace (according to Webster's)- a unmerited diving assistance given to humans for their regeneration or sanctification; a virtue coming from God; approval, favor; MERCY/PARDON
mercy (according to Webster's)-lenient or compassionate treatment; a blessing that is an act of divine favor or compassion

So, both grace and mercy (in their very definition) both include the word "divine"-meaning, from God. These are two traits that for us are extremely hard to give and sometimes receive. I believe it is because we are not divine therefore we will never truly understand such an unconditional love given to us by God's grace. 
"For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God." (Ephesians 2:8)
See, grace is something we don't deserve to have. We can't do anything to earn His grace, or favor. God willingly gives it to those who love Him. Those who are saved. Mercy on the other hand is not earned either. How many of us are thankful for God's mercies that are new each day. We mess up. We sin. But God is so faithful to forgive us and show us mercy and not damn us to hell. What a blessing! Wow. If we would only realize how great a gift these are we would start living a whole lot differently. I guess I should finish reading that book by Chuck Swindoll, The Grace Awakening. lol.

So why am I so serious in talking about this grace and mercy stuff? Well, I will gladly tell you. For the past week or so I have not slept more than 4 or 5 hrs. a night because my sweet and precious daughter won't let me. Now, last night was the last straw! My darling didn't fall asleep until after 2 am. all the while I am doing everything in my power to keep my sanity. I walked away, I prayed, I angrily prayed (lol), I told her she had to go to bed (guess how well that worked), we put her in the pack-n-play (which she flipped herself out of), we shut her in the room, and we tried to soothe and caress her. Nothing was working. I was at my wits end. I was so angry and weak (physically and mentally). What could I do? This is why I am so thankful for a gift only given by God because when I looked at her I saw His grace. I felt His unconditional love for her at my weakest moment. I realized something: while she doesn't 'deserve' all this love and affection because she is being rotten, I can do nothing but give it to her because God gave it to me. So, I kept rocking and rocking and feeding and finally...she was asleep. Now it took me a few hours to get to this point and before that I'm sure God would have sent me to hell just for my attitude and thoughts. haha. But He didn't. He understands I am not perfect. I am a sinner. I am angry. I am sad. I am depressed and weary.
"For He has said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for the power is perfected in weakness.."(2 Corinthians 12:9)

I am still exhausted and a little frusterated but I am thankful that in a very trying moment, God was still able to teach me a very important lesson. I should listen more often.
night folks. my eyes are burning and me and the bed have a date!
tii